open my heart

bismillah.

16 September 2011. It was one of the best friday nights I ever had with my sisters. Syahira, Nadiah Hazwani, Musfirah, Su'aidah, Hazirah, Izyan, Aisyah, Ustazah Su'aidah and Ustazah Jamilah. Intially, the plan was to have usrah, syawal edition at mosque. However, we changed plan and head to Su'aidah house which was nearby for our usrah. Had pizza delivery as well. We had our tazkirah and sharing session after so long. Alhamdulillah, everything went smoothly. Each and everyone of us had a turn to talk and let out all our problems. Some cried, some smiled. The best part is, we'll always stand by each other no matter what. The ukhuwah that we forge is stronger than rope. I really learn a lot from these people. They're my pillar of strength and my motivation. We made each other feel belonged. That's why I love them a lot and always pray that Allah bless them with the best happiness and beautiful souls. Masyallah, I won't want to swap anything in this world for them.

16 September also marks a new beginning for me. I shall not say what it is because Ustazah told me, "The best intentions is by actions". Thus, you see my actions then you'll understand what I mean by a new beginning. I pray and hope that Allah will guide me through this journey. I know it will not be easy neither it will be very difficult. I believe with strong faith, heart and intention, this journey of becoming a better person will be smooth sailing. I took a step to make a change because I thought to myself, till when am I going to be acting this way? Each day, I am closer to death. Am I not afraid of death? Am I not afraid of all my past mistakes? Am I not afraid of dissappointing Allah? I thought, its time for me to wake up from my fantasy. "Wake up, Amalina. You're getting older by the day and your sins are accumulating. Aren't you afraid of Afterlife?" I questioned myself eveytime. What makes me reallly convince to change was a hadith from Prophet Muhammad. Its something about do not delay a good action because you never know when you life is taken away. Once I read that, it was a real wake up call to me.

nuff' said. bottom line, I hope other teenage girls like me will open up their heart to change for the better and repent. Once you learn about the values and teachings of Al-quran, I assure you, you'll cry till your tears dry up and you're touched by the beauty of Islam. :')